So I would like to take you on a mini journey into the creepy and depressing world
of
_____
|__.__|
_____ _________ _______ ___.___ _____ __
/ _ \ / _____/ / ___ \| | | / _ \________/ |_
/ /_\ \ \_____ \ / \ \/| | | / /_\ \_ __ \ __\
/ | \/ \\ \___| | | / | \ | \/| |
\_::.|___ /_.:::.___/ \.::.___ /:._|.:.| \::..|____/:.| |._|
(Thanks to ASCII Art Dictionary Website)
For those of you too young to remember, or those who were not indoor kids in their youth,
ASCII art is defined by Wikipedia as:
an artistic medium that relies primarily on computers for presentation and consists of pictures pieced together from the 95 printable (from a total of 128) characters defined by the ASCII Standard from 1967 and ASCII compliant character sets with proprietary extended characters (beyond the 128 characters of the 7-bit standard ASCII). The term is also loosely used to refer to text based art in general. |
So what does this tell us? Well, it's pictures made out of ASCII. If you've ever downloaded anything illegal in the past, you probably got an *.nfo file with the archive. They used to be referred to as readme files, but it seems that has gone the way of the floppy disk.
Also, if you've ever read a posting from NNTP-based newsgroups (alt.*, rec.*, comp.*, etc), you've probably seen some ners post these in their signature space. This is mainly done because newsgroups don't have graphics capabilities in posts. So, here we have to use our imaginations.
1. Signatures
Okay, so we've got that covered. Pictures made from ASCII. Let's start with some graphics people have used as signatures in newsgroups.
''~``
( o o )
+------------------.oooO--(_)--Oooo.------------------+
| |
| .oooO |
| ( ) Oooo. |
+---------------------\ (----( )--------------------+
\_) ) /
(_/
I have seen this used countless times in newsgroups. Yes, it's a dude hanging on a sign or a piece of plywood or something. The feet are rather large. This is funny. In 1991, this was in everyone's signature in the newsgroups.
One of the "rules" of signature ASCII was that it was preferable to keep it down to 4 or less lines. So here are a few (Thanks to ASCII Art Dictionary Website)
-----------------------------------------------------------------
o \ o / _ o __| \ / |__ o _ \ o / o
/|\ | /\ __\o \o | o/ o/__ /\ | /|\
/ \ / \ | \ /) | ( \ /o\ / ) | (\ / | / \ / \
-----------------------------------------------------------------
o _ _ _
_o /\_ _ \\o (_)\__/o (_)
_< \_ _>(_) (_)/<_ \_| \ _|/' \/
(_)>(_) (_) (_) (_) (_)' _\o_
-----------------------------------------------------------------
___ __ ___ () () ___ _,_ _/|_
__\\ (/_'// \)'||'|| ==== __\\'||\) ||
((_||_,_/)\\__,_||_||_ ((_||_||_ \|_
You get the picture. Usually there would be the person's info such as name/handle, contact info, some witty phrase, whatever.
2. Emoticons
The ubiquitous emoticon. :) Even my parents know what it is, and they still call Windows "AOL" as in "Did you boot into that Linux you installed or into AOL?" They don't know their OS from their elbow but they sure as hell know what an emoticon is. They don't even have to cock their head to the left. That's how well entrenched the emoticon is in our daily lives. :-/ But as creative as you think you might be in making emoticons, there have been people that havegone apeshit with them. 8-O What's that, you say? More creative than your ASCII representation of the emotion you feel at the end of your sentence? INDEED! Observe. (Thanks to AlienEntity Free Icons)
=):-)= Abraham Lincoln
( <> .. <> ) Alienated
O:-) Angel
0:-) Angel
:-|| Angry, very
(:-& Angry
>:-< Angry
}: [ Angry, frustrated
;-( Angry, or got a black eye
>:-( Annoyed
|-| Asleep
|I Asleep
:C Astonished
8-O Astonished
@== Atomic bomb
~:o Baby
][ Back to back
(::()::) Bandaid, meaning comfort
~== Begins a flame (inflammatory message)
=^D Big grin
|-D Big laugh
?( Black eye
?-( Black eye
!-( Black eye
:-{} Blowing a kiss
: [ Bored, sad
: | Bored, sad
%-6 Brain-dead
~= Candle, with flame indicating inflammatory message
-= Candle snuffed , end a flame message
:*) Clowning
Q:-) College graduate
%-( Confused
:~/ Confused
:~-( Crying
:\' Crying
:,( Crying
:\'( Crying
;( Crying
:.( Crying
:\'-( Crying
:\'-) Crying, tears of happiness
8-# Death
%-) Dazed or silly
:-| :-| Deja vu
]:-> Devil
]:-) Devil, happy
<:> Devilish expression
<:-> Devilish expression
>:-> Devil, very mischievous
>-) Devilish wink
X-( Died
:e Disappointed
12x@>--->--- Dozen roses
:-e Disappointed
<:-| Dunce
<:-( Dunce
<:| Dunce
(:| Egghead
~:-\ Elvis
~:\ Elvis
5:-) Elvis
\_/ Empty glass
~~:-( Especially hot flame message
:-6 Exhausted
}{ Face to face
O+ Female
~~:[ Flame, net
[:| Frankenstein
[:-| Frankenstein
P* French kiss
8-[ Frayed nerves; overwrought
:-( Frown
\~/ Full glass
>-< Furious
>-< Furious
>>:-<< Furious
>- Female
>-< Furious
^ ^ ^ Giggles
|-{ Good grief!
%+{ Got beat up
:+( Got punched in the nose
%\ Hangover
:^D Happy, approval
:{ Having a hard time
d :-o Hats off to you
:X Hear no evil
^5 High five
( 8(|) Homer
{{ }} Hug, e.g. {{name of person being hugged}}
[] Hug
((())) Huggs, lots
() Hugging
(( )):** Hugs and kisses
%-} Humorous or ironic
%-\ Hung over
IOHO In Our Humble Opinion
:-| Indifferent, bored or disgusted
%*} Inebriated
8 Infinity
<:-) Innocently asking dumb question
%-{ Ironic
:* Kiss
:-* Kiss
(:-* Kiss
:x Kiss
* Kiss
=^* Kisses
:-x Kiss, or My lips are sealed
|-<> Kiss, puckered up to kiss
:->< Kiss, puckered up to kiss
+<||-) Knight
/\/\/\ Laughter
:-D Laughing
>:) Little devil
:-9 Lips, licking
= X Lips are sealed
:-? Lips, licking or tongue in cheek
:( ) Loudmouth, talks all the time; or shouting
>:-< Mad
O-> Male
:- Male
>:-) Mischievous devil
$-) Money in mind, won money or thinking about money
+<:-| Monk or nun
:-# My lips are sealed; or someone wearing braces
:/) Not funny
{} No comment
:/i No smoking
:-O Open-mouthed, surprised
:-l One-sided smile
:-j One-sided smile
:-I Pondering, or impartial
+O:-) Pope, The Pope
+:-) Priest
%(|:-) Propeller-head
!-) Proud of black eye
:-k Puzzlement
=:-) Punk, hosehead
(:- Unsmiley
(:-( Unsmiley
[:] Robot
[:|] Robot
@}->-- Rose
@>--->--- Rose, long stemmed
+<:-) Religious leader
7:) Ronald Reagan
7:^) Ronald Reagan
:**: Returning kiss
(:-) Smiley variation
M:-) Salute
*<:-) Santa Claus
*<|:-) Santa Claus, or a clown
*-) Shot to death
:-Y Side comment
:-p~ Smoker
8-o Shocked
: ( Sad
:-V Shouting
|-( Sleepy, struggling to stay awake, or sleeping badly
|( Sleepy (on late night email message)
:-\'| Sniffles
:-] Smiling blockhead; also sarcasm
:-} Smile, mischievous
:-{) Smile with moustache
:-{)} Smile with moustache and beard
:-) smiley Classic
(-: Smile, left-handed, or smiley from the south
B:-) Sunglasses on head
:`-( Shedding a tear
O8-) Starry-eyed angel
= O Surprised
M-) See no evil
M-), :X, :-M See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil
O 8-) Starry-eyed angel
|^o Snoring
~ :-( Steaming mad
: ) Smile
:-> Smile of happiness or sarcasm
:-, Smirk
:-@ Screaming
:-d~ smoker, heavy
:-f Sticking out tongue
:-Q~ Smoking
:-r Sticking tongue out
:-M Speak no evil
:-P Sticking out tongue
:-p Sticking tongue out
#:-o Shocked
:~) Sick, from a cold
:-~) Sick, from a cold
:-~| Sick, from a cold
~~~~8} Snake
[:-] Square head
:-o Surprised look, or yawn
:-J Tongue in cheek
-) Tongue in cheek
:-Q Tongue hanging out in disgust, or a smoker
:-Q Tongue hanging out in disgust, or a smoker
2B|^2B To be or not to be
:P tongue,s ticking out
:-& Tongue-tied
:-t Unsmiley
:-[ Unsmiling; also criticism
(:-\ Very sad
:-c Very sad
:-< Very sad
[:-) Wearing a Walkman
:> What?
:@ What?
; ) Wink
; P Wink with a raspberry
\') Winky
\'-) Winky
;-) Winky
;-D Winking and laughing
:-s What?!
#-) Wiped out, partied all night
8 :-) Wizard
8) Wide-eyed, or wearing glasses
8-) Wide-eyed, or wearing glasses
>-> Winking devil
:-/ Wry face
}-) Wry smile
:-i Wry smile or half-smile
%-| Worked all night
8-] Wow!
-=#:-) Wizard
8-| Wide-eyed surprise
8-P Yuck!
|-O Yawn
>=^ P Yuck
Obviously, someone has done their homework. Personally, I tend not to go beyond the old standby :) or :(
3. GRAPHIC TO ASCII
Now you've sat in your basement for the last 3 nights when you weren't at the factory packing boxes with styrofoam peants for 9.25 an hour, working on your signature masterpiece. You have created the perfect representation of a cow hopping over a fence in four lines. This will be a truly magnificent contribution to mankind in the form of... an ASCII cow jumping over an ASCII fence. Regardless of the lameness, you are overjoyed at the chance to share this harvest of mental seed with the rest of the planet.
You rabidly open up your newsreader and run to alt.ascii-art to post this godsend, only to see:
::WWWWWWWWWWWWKKWWWWKKDDDDKKDDKKKKWWKKKKKKWWWWii
LL######WWWW##############KKGGKKKKDDDDKKKKWW##WW;;
ttEEWW####KK####KKEEEEWW##WWKK##GGKKDDLLWW##KKDDWWWWKK;;
..jjff####WW##KKLLWW######KKKKDDWWKKKKKKLL####LLDDWW####WW
;;ttLL##WW##KKGGWW######WW##DDDDGG##WWDDWWWWWWDDWW########tt
ffWWWW##EEKKWW############WWGGGGDD##WW##WWWWKKKKWW######KK
LL##########################WWDDDDGG##WWWWKK####KKDD########
GGEE######################KKLLGGKKWWDDWWWWffKK##KKDDKK####WW..
ffWW######################DDEEEEffffffffDDGGGG##EEGGKK######
..########################KKfftt;;,,..,,;;jjffttDDWWDDWWWW##GG
;;WW####################WWffjj;;:: ..,,;;;;,,;;LLWWEEKK##jj
LLEEEEKK####WW##DDffffffii;;,,::........::,,,,,,,,;;EEDDWW##;;
LL##WW##WWWW##WWjj,,,,;;,,,,,,::::......::::::,,::,,,,GGDDWW##..
..GGLL##DDffGGDDDD,,,,,,,,;;tttt,,............::::::,,,,;;DDKKWWWWii
ffjjjj####LL,,,,;;ii;;,,,,,,;;;;,,iittii......::::::::,,,,iiWW##WW##..
..ffKK##WW####jjii;;tt;;,,::..,,jjLLffttjjtt::::::::,,,,,,;;ff######DD
jjKK########KKttjj;;;;,,....;;ttDDDDDDjjtt,,,,,,,,,,,,;;GG######ff
..;;KK########LLjjttii;;,,....::iiii,,ttjjii,,,,,,ttjjLLDD##WW##KKtt
..LL##########ffjjiiii;;,,::......;;tttt,,;;..iiDDWWDDDDff##WW##LL;;
LLKKWWWW####jjjj;;ii;;;;::....::::::..,,,,::jjiiii;;EEWWWWKKDDjj..
..DDWWWWEE##jjtttt;;ii;;;;,,....::......::::,,ii,,ttffttLLDDDDGG,,
DDDDLLEEWWGGtttttt;;;;;;;;,,,,::::::..::::..;;;;,,,,;;;;iiGGLLii
ttGGDDEEWWWW;;iitttt;;;;;;;;,,,,,,,,,,,,,,:: ;;;;,,;;;;ttiiGGff
ttGGWWWW##ff;;;;ttjj;;;;;;,,,,,,,,,,..;;::::..ii,,,,;;ttffGGff,,
LLKK##ff;;;;;;;;jj;;;;,,,,,,,,::::..,,tt::::ii,,;;iiffttttii::
LLGG;;;;,,;;;;jjii;;;;,,,,;;tt::....::ttfftt;;ii,,,,..;;..,,
..ii,,;;,,,,,,;;;;ff;;,,,,,,::,,ffff;;,,;;iittttff ,, ,, ii
::iitt,,,,;;,,,,,,;;;;jjjj;;,,,,,,::tt;;LLLLLLffttWWtt.... ::..,,
,,;;;;;;,,,,,,,,,,::,,,,,,,,;;jjtt;;,,::::,,ttttjjffjjtt##,,.. ,,
..,,,,;;;;;;,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,;;jjii,,,,::::,,;;jjjj;;DDDD.. ::,,
;;;;;;;;;;,,,,,,,,::::::,,::::::::,,,,,,;;iiffjj,,,,,,,,;;LLEEGGjjGG ,,;;..
,,,,,,,,;;;;;;,,,,::..::,,::..::::::::,,;;;;ttfffftt;;;;GGtt;;jjttii ,,::..
,,::....::,,;;;;;;,,,,,,,,::..::::::::::,,,,;;ffGGKKEEDDLLLLDDffii .. ii..
,,,,::....,,,,,,,,;;;;,,,,,,......::::..::::;;ttLLLLLLffffjjjjjj.. ,, ,, ..
,,::::::..::,,......::,,,,,,,,::::......::::;;;;jjjjjjffffjjttjjjj,,.. ..,,
::::......::::............::::,,,,::::::::,,,,;;iijjffffjjjjjjffjjjjjj,, ::;;
::........::..................::::::,,::::,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,jj;;;;;;iitt,,jj
....................................,,::..::,,::,,::::::,,,,,,ii,,,,,,,,,,;;jj,,
Something is very obviously rotten in the town of Denmark, and you got the shaft! What can this be? HOW can this be? It took you 3 days to come up with 4 lines of perfectly placed ASCII and some bastard with a DOS converting program can make you look like an ass in less than a second! Yes, it's the talentless world of (in my opinion) graphic to ASCII conversion.
They can even do it to colored HTML and make you look like even more of a talentless hack, with your stupid cow and your stupid fence:
ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUV
WXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQR
STUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMN
OPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJ
KLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEF
GHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZAB
CDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWX
YZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRST
UVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOP
QRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJK
MNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGH
IJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCD
EFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ
ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUV
WXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQR
STUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMN
OPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJ
KLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEF
GHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZAB
CDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWX
YZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRST
UVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOP
QRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKL
MNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGH
IJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCD
EFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ
ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUV
WXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQR
STUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMN
OPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJ
KLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEF
GHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZAB
CDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWX
YZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRST
UVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOP
QRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKL
MNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGH
IJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCD
There is no love! You tear your hair out and go to bed. You can make HTML ART or ASCII ART from ANY graphic!
One can truly say that non-automated ASCII art creation is a lost artform. If anyone still makes these things, they are a dying if not dead art. I know I personally took days to make some decent and witty ASCII drawings for my signatures over the years and like text-based-browser-compliant websites, they're all gone. It's quite sad, really.
Here are some decent links to more than everything you've ever wanted to know about ASCII art...
Wikipedia Entry On ASCII Art
ASCII Art Dictionary
ASCII Art Generator (Great For Signatures)
Image To ASCII/HTML Converter
The Google Directory Of ASCII Art and Artists
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